Wednesday, May 23, 2012
things are so much different now. and i know its not because of your exams. it is a vicious cycle. u hiding things from me > me start to doubt you and getting all sensitive > you, afraid to make me upset further in turn start hiding more things > me getting more sensitive. i want this cycle to stop. and honesty is the key. i want this to stop so bad, coz i cant always make myself believe whatever you say even there's things to prove otherwise.
2:39 PMMonday, April 30, 2012
its bb's bd. its gonna be great and all, just disappointed that it will be celebrated in this light. i feel like i cant really put a finger to many things now. like, why do i get upset. i really dont know the exact reason, and i just really want somebody, anybody to make it go away. im losing control over things, and myself. its almost the worse thing ever to lose control over myself. its like 2009 all over again. and it suck even more to realise that i hadn't progress much. fuck. seriously. i need a grip.
10:42 AMMonday, April 09, 2012
i like taking naps at urs.
me opening my eyes, making small sound..
you rushing over to kiss me on my head once you know im awake.
were those the days?
11:48 PMhi happy.
stay, will you?
3:09 PMThursday, April 05, 2012
all i want, is being to trust,
being able to rely on what you say,
being able to believe what you say,
being able to even defend you when everything else prove otherwise.
11:57 AMTuesday, March 27, 2012
i hate insecurities. thats why i make sure im in control all the time, or at least most of the time.
i know ive got eating disorder. im actually happy, coz im in control, at least for my weight. im not like you, self loathers who sit and eat and continue to wallow in self pity. im glad im doing smth about it.
its nt easy telling urself this is okay. heartburns are frequent, indigestion is always there.. and its increasingly hard to get food stay in me. i keep telling myself, its worth it.
you ask me, why torture myself.
tts because u dont know me.
if u take away my strength, why dont u just kill me?
the latter is actually better.
12:02 AMSunday, January 29, 2012
nevermind, i'll find someone like you.
i wish nothing, but the best for you too.
remember me, i beg. i remember you said,
sometimes love last, sometimes it hurts instead.
3:58 AMFriday, October 21, 2011
we stayed cause you're hurt.
we didnt go cause we're hurt too.
5:26 AMFriday, October 07, 2011
where are u when i need u most.
12:48 AMMonday, October 03, 2011
im nv good at making wise decisions.
so i rather not.
but i cant.
so im miserable.
4:17 AMWednesday, September 14, 2011
hi.
ive lost my way.
you look familiar.
have i seen you from somewhere?
i cant remember where i was from.
can you take me home?
12:06 AMFriday, September 09, 2011
fucking hate your double standards.
fuck you.
1:43 AMSunday, July 10, 2011
yesternight.
9:57 PMSaturday, July 02, 2011
i yearn to be set free.
im trapped. still trapped.
save me..
whilst i solace in this melancholy.
2:34 AMMonday, May 16, 2011
can you take away all the pain?
12:43 AMMonday, January 31, 2011
hello 2011, and hello my super hiatus ranting space.
2011 have been pretty nice to me so far, so stay that way will you? :)
tuitions are driving me tad crazy.
meanwhile, im trying duper hard to survive every single one of it.
my face have turn into some furtile breeding ground. pimples never stop growing. D:
2 more sems to go.
projects... are... dreadful... :((
2:46 AMTuesday, November 23, 2010
im feeling pretty nauseous today. and no, im not pregnant. :/
1:21 AMThursday, September 23, 2010
holy crap! its been a insane 3 months since i last updated here.
life's been pretty uneventful , no major emotion turmoils, but still, small pain-in-e-ass situations are almost inevitable.
it's sem 3 now. in about a year's time I will be rejoining the workforce. I'm definitely not feeling the dread anymore. in fact I'm looking forward to it. armed w a degree and working experiences in my bag, I'm eager to see what the working society has to offer. I'm excited about convocation too. that mortar board, graduation robe and well wishing from relatives and friends are half the motivation to work hard now.
im a month + 7 days away from exams. havent really feel that sense of urgency.. but i do know the shit is brewing. i need to get myself on the right track fast. histories that i do not want to repeat.
4:15 AMSaturday, June 26, 2010
its 4 more days to krabi! and im extremely excited!
im excited about the food, weather, the stay, the activities and most importantly spending quality time w momo! :)
we're heading there via tiger, which is the only budget airline that goes to krabi.
(next time shall try to trek from phuket to krabi, which might save on some airfare)
Ananta Burin, the hotel we chose, is located 10 mins from Ao Nang beach, relatively near Ao Nang centre.
we've decided not to get the pool access room so as to save some money, but still! we're having pool view pool w huge balcony so that we can still do some sun basking. :)
ahhhh! i cant wait! :)
2:35 AMWednesday, June 23, 2010
momo at worldcup. :)
8:12 PMMonday, June 21, 2010
its 21st june! and momo will be back tmr at 7pm.
i cant wait. :D
6:59 PMTuesday, June 01, 2010
skype w ♥.
4:00 AMWednesday, May 19, 2010
3rd june will be dooms day.
i cringe at the thought of it. and having no momo by my side this time round..
oh well.
its holidays. yes.. and ive been sleeping late and waking up even later.
im trying damn hard to correct my sleeping habits..
forcing myself to wake up ard noon even i have nothing to do at all.
well.. for my skin, i have to do it.
hydrate, and sleep well. the 2 that i can do since i cant help about the sun issue.
i went jb w jerine and ginni yest.
its kinda awesome since its only us. free to shop and browse slowly.
did lotsa toiletries shopping and im lovin it.
cant wait for the next time we girls do that again. :)
i need to get working like soon!
school fees.. bills..
.. and krabi trip at e end of june not helping at all.
sigh...
5:50 PMSunday, May 09, 2010
new desk layout. plus bro's old pc. wasnt that old actually.. :)
5:45 AMTuesday, May 04, 2010
happy fifth. :)))
imm glad we came this far.
hold my hand like how you do now, and never let go. :)))
its one more day to my last paper and i'll be free from sch for a little bit.
i think i do actually enjoy having school.. just that this sem seems to be a little too fastpaced.
im not gonna talk about my law paper.
darn right. i need new havis.
Labels: exams, momo, monthsary
4:25 AM